Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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