No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize
