some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize