Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
where does the pee come out of this thing
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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