I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
