we're chasing vodka with high fives
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize