Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
