I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
