Church boner. Awkwardddd
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
