i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
