My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
How does it feel to date your dad?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize