i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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