we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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