You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
