Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
