Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize