We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize