just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
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