just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize