Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
