3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize