if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I deserve this hangover.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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