Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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