Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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