did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
