Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
