If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I'm at about main and main street
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
