Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
