So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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