Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
