morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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