I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize