ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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