if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize