I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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