HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
