I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
