Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Randomize
