That's intense
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Can I color on your dick again?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Randomize
