He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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