On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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