My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
