If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
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