she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
