WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
