idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
