There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
