Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize