Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Randomize
