doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
